I was not diagnosed with dyslexia until adulthood. My adult child does not understand how certain words are difficult for me to repeat back because I don’t hear the sound of all the letters like they do. Therefore, when I repeat it back, I think I’m saying it correctly, but I am not. I know this has something to do with my dyslexia because I think I’m hearing it, but I am not hearing all the sounds. Are there tools that I should be using to help? 

Because I get so uncomfortable and nervous and get corrected so often by them, they’re beginning to think I’m showing early signs of dementia; therefore, I have tried to commit myself to many batteries of tests for memory, and all my doctors so far say I’m doing an outstanding job, especially for my age.

Dr. Pierson’s Response:

I am sorry that you are having these struggles. Many people with dyslexia can experience difficulty with word productions, especially sequencing sounds in multisyllabic words. It can also be a challenge if you learned to pronounce a word incorrectly as a child — it can be difficult to change that early learned behavior. When I am working with a student, we will break these long words into syllables and slowly combine them into the whole word, and then we practice, practice, practice. First, saying the word in isolation; then in short phrases, sentences; and finally, working to realize when it is occurring in one’s conversational speech.

Working with a speech-language pathologist (SLP) on tricky words could be helpful. You could keep a list of challenging words and target those with the clinician. The American-Speech-Language-Hearing Association would be a good place to start to try and find an SLP in your area. https://www.asha.org/profind/

Regarding your child’s behavior, clearly, it is not helpful to you and needs to change. Given that they have not changed their behavior when you have asked them to, you might need to try family counseling. Your child needs to understand that your difficulties are a result of your dyslexia, and it is simply not kind to make fun of anyone with a disability. One of the hallmarks of dyslexia is a difficulty with phonological awareness – perceiving, discriminating, and manipulating the sounds of our language (in the absence of letters). Brain imaging has shown that the brains of individuals with dyslexia do not process the sounds (and syllables) of our language in the same way that a non-dyslexic brain does. In other words, you cannot help this, and your child needs to stop teasing you about it. I don’t know how old they are, but I’m hoping old enough to know better and smart enough and motivated to be able to change their behavior. Hopefully, you can find a counselor/psychologist in your area. Even if they will not go with you, you could benefit from talking with someone about strategies to help you cope with the negative behavior, and potentially change it. 

My heart goes out to you, and I wish you the very best.